When I was younger, I fell in love with the idea of falling in love.

I taught myself that without a partner, I was incomplete - and that with one, all of life’s problems would be solved. I taught myself that through companionship, life would be more full, and until this was achieved, my life was not.

I learned through my first romantic relationship that this was not the case. I learned that we are much more than our romantic selves. I learned that we have a whole life to live outside of our role as a romantic partner. I learned that it is important to live your life.

I then taught myself that I needed to work on myself, tirelessly, until I was complete. I taught myself that once I fixed all of my life’s problems, then I would be deserving of love. I taught myself that through individualism, I would be able to earn companionship. I taught myself that my life must first be full before I could love.

I have come to learn that this is also not the case. I have learned that we are always deserving of love. I have learned that you do not need to be some complete form of yourself to be presentable. I have learned that my ideal form of companionship is one that looks like walking two adjacent paths, rooting for each other throughout the journey. I have learned that there is a whole life for you to live alongside your romantic partner. I have learned that a hand ought to be held. I have learned that it is important to live your life.